Well, in the scheme of things of our world, this is not really major news, but it was kind of the Bieber-that-broke-the-camel's-back for me. Being a christian mother of five kids (or any number) it is a constant struggle to help my kids to be "in the world and not of it." (Not sure where that quote comes from). And you know what? Let's put the Christianity aside-because what's good is good. Most of us are good parents who want the best for our children and we can probably all agree on that.
So, did I attack Justin Bieber? Not directly, but I may have contributed to the societal phenomenon that caused his attack. I have heard that if we are not part of the solution, then we are part of the problem.
Justin Bieber used to be a little kid who liked to sing and play the drums. Before he was an adult, he became-like many other child stars have-an object of idolization, ridicule, superstardom, sometimes abuse, and whatever else our fickle media and public opinion think of his actions each day. That is a lot to deal with for a child. It's a lot to deal with for many child stars. Think of every cute little movie/tv/Internet/music sensation that you can that has ended up on drugs, been abused, is an early onset alcoholic, or fill-in-the-blank. And GOD FORBID that you were an adorable kid who turned out to look like an unattractive adult. Many of those kids never work again!
So, what's my point? This is not about good or bad, people. This is about evidence and observation. There seems to be a direct link between celebrity life (for kids AND adults-but let's stick with kids for now) and troubled lives. We have a responsibility to protect out children and also protect other children in any way we can whenever possible. Now, I'm not telling you it our fault. I'm not telling you to boycott the childhood entertainment industry- but I would probably admire you if you did. :) What I AM saying is that I think we have to start talking to our children about this problem and not allowing the media and celebrities have to so much influence in their lives.
Here's some background info on me: My kids love most media, but their favorite is children's entertainment. First, I'll begin by saying that I don't let them watch heavy violence or sexual content because I don't want to fill their heads with thought of things that I would not want them to do in real life. I have heard that kids act out things that they don't understand and they don't know how to process a lot of mature content? That can cause them negative repercussions, emotional trauma, etc.
The REST of children's entertainment is pretty shallow and mildly inappropriate, to say the least.
Here is how I have I chosen to deal with that:
1-I have selected a list of things that my kids enjoy and shows that I don't feel are giving them a warped view of life or a fascination with rebellion and dating.
Result: my kids have a healthier respect for parents and dating and we talk about the shows they watch. They involve me and they understand why I have made these entertainment boundaries.
2-I have also chosen to only have Netflix, Hulu, and the Internet, which I am in charge of and we don't watch commercials normally.
Result: Since my kids stopped watching commercials, they are more grateful for what they have, they aren't always crying and melting down in retail store aisles, and they hate me a lot less.
3-Due to studies I have read about the negative physiological effect of too much media stimulation, We no longer watch TV or play video games on school nights (except for rare treats or much needed mommy breaks).
Result: My house is quieter and I like that. I didn't realize that I was addicted to the noise of the TV. My kids get along better because of our increase in family time. And, they know that they can use the Internet or iPad (when they have been responsible) to use study games and they are leaning more.
** Here's something else that was a pretty profound experience for me: I stopped having the TV babysit my kids and we have a better relationship because of that. This is a miracle folks! When they were little, I was afraid to turn the TV off because I didn't know what I was going to do without it. True story.
4-Then, I made the decision to keep them busy having fun and being creative, so they wouldn't even notice reduction in media consumption. I'm also trying to get us out of the sedentary lifestyle, be more active, play board games and cards, tell stories, grow plants, and the list goes on and on.
Result: more fun & and more love. :)
5-I have also chosen to have some non-judgemental conversations with my two older kids about how their favorite struggling stars are doing and encourage them to pray for them.
Result:my older kids have learned some valuable lessons and they care about the kids in the field of entertainment. They respect them and see them as real people!
6-NOT COOL ALERT!!! This might be a hard one, but I said NO to my kids when they had the desire to make an idol of CHILD performer. Now, we have had t-shirts and some neat school supplies, but it has been within reason. I also did not allow them to build child idol shrines in their bedrooms-you know like home made room dividers made entirely of Joe McIntyre posters like a certain junior high best friend of mine. And I have discouraged long-distance crush affairs that leave you crying in the floor because I didn't get to go to the NKOTB concert and all my friends did! Oh, I mean "them"...and something about "One Direction." ;)
In Closing, i want to make sure that you hear me say that we really enjoy entertainment whenever we reasonably can. We really do. Im not here to point fingers. If I ever do anything right in my life, its almost always the direct result it doing it wrong once or a hundred times- and its no exception in this case. Also, I am not condemning the famous kids, the fanatic kids, or their parents. The industry? Maybe, but this is more about what we can do to be healthy and not contribute to hurting ALL children. So about the list-use it. Don't use it. Make your own. But do SOMETHING. Maybe think twice before you click on the TMZ story about Lilo. Maybe choose not to buy that magazine with the provocative airbrushed photo of someone you know is not legally an adult. I'd love to hear some of your methods too! Please take a minute to comment on this and give me some wisdom or thoughts about this situation. And remember, parents don't let kids look like this:
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